A stroke transformed the life of Garrett Mendez when he was 19 years old. It paralysed his whole body. With the support of his family, friends, and the staff at Gaylord Hospital in Connecticut, he recovered. Now 20 years later, Garrett is a rehab aide at Gaylord Hospital’s new facility in Fairfield. WSHU's Randye Kaye speaks with Garrett about how he helps other stroke patients recover.
WSHU: Okay, so full disclosure, I've known Garret since he was a child. It's just one of those things, and very aware of your story. My first question for you, as a rehab aide, is: who do you help, and how?
GM: So I loved, I love to help out patients who I can see are struggling during therapy, especially, and kind of helping to give them some inspiration or just by leading by example, by showing them it gets better, keep working, keep rehabbing to their fullest potential. Because I know through different rehabs that doing the same task over and over again can be very tedious after a while, and that needs some help to kind of push through those hard moments and keep rehabbing, keep going.
WSHU: Yeah, I would say that, having been a patient myself, I know that that's absolutely true. Why you? What brought you to this work?
GM: Yeah, so at 19 years old, about 20 years ago, I suffered a brain stem stroke from an athletic injury. What happened was I was playing ice hockey, as I had been my whole life. And I dove for a puck, even though I was wearing a helmet, I slid head first in the boards, and that trauma and impact into the boards is what caused the stroke. And I went through years and years of vigorous rehab myself. I was fully paralyzed, initially. I couldn't speak, I couldn't really see. I was seeing double vision, really, but I couldn't eat food or swallow. But with the help of Gaylord Hospital and their rehab, which provided physical therapy, occupational, and speech therapy, I was able to reclaim parts of my life, and now I hope to do that to help inspire others to help reclaim their life and continue to rehab.
WSHU: Yeah, that's amazing. Now, it's my understanding, Garrett, that it's really unusual for somebody so young to have a stroke. Is that right?
GM: Yes, it's very unusual, although I'm sad to say it's been getting more normal with kids beginning to get bigger and faster at sports, having harder impacts, but usually, typically, it's around 40 or 50 years old that happens. But again, my accident wasn't caused by any kind of medical issue or anything. This was a traumatic event that was beyond my control.
WSHU: And it didn't happen right away. From what I understand, you went to bed, you were fine, and your mom found you.
GM: Yeah, but I went to bed one night thinking I had a bad case of the flu. This is five days after the hit and…
WSHU: Five days ?!
GM: Yes, and I thought that I would feel better in the morning. My mother came to check on me. I couldn't do anything. All I could do was cry, and that's what prompted her to rush me to the hospital.
WSHU: Right. And I know that you had a lot of support there, and I can't even imagine you were like a hockey star, like you were fully invested in this sport and your future. You were completely paralyzed or just one side?
GM: Right. Initially, both sides were paralyzed, whereas my right side was still affected to some degree. I have tight, spastic muscles, but as soon as I put weight through my left side, it came back right away, and it's fine. So I don't know why the right side is still impacted the way it is. I'm not sure, but definitely the support I received from my parents and my family was amazing. Also, the incredible employees at Gaylord Hospital have always supported me from day one, and they still do to this day.
WSHU: Yeah, I have heard a few stories of how they came in and just made jokes.
GM: Oh yeah. It was through tragedy that I've learned that we've unfortunately had to learn, you know, that you have to laugh through every moment to get. It helps. It does help. It does help.
WSHU: I know you were greatly helped at Gaylord, and then you went back to Sacred Heart University, and you got your degree in psychology. So tell me about your motivation for that and the kind of support and journey for that.
GM: Correct. So before I decided to get my degree in psychology. I was a volunteer at Gaylord Hospital, and one of the things I would do as a peer mentor at Gaylord, being that I was a former patient, I was able to speak to patients in the room, one-on-one, about how they're doing during their stay at Gaylord. Maybe they've encountered something that I can. Help them overcome or bring supplies to them to help deal with it better. And that really prompted me to delve deeper into psychology.
WSHU: And so you have your Bachelor's…
GM: Correct in psychology.
WSHU: …in psychology. So what do you do now as a rehab aid on a typical day in the new Gaylord facility? And you're working full-time there now, right? So what's a day like for you?
GM: So the days change. I do everything, pretty much at the facility, minus some of the front desk tasks, but I do help with a few of the front desk scheduling, having to answer phone calls, but also having to clean the facility and make sure there's no obstructions in the area, that it's safe, because that's our main priority with rehab, to be safe, and really just anything that therapists need, I'll help them help if they need assistance with patients, or different exercises with patients, and really, just like have a great therapeutic environment comfortable for people to understand the therapy process is just very warm and welcoming environment for them.
WSHU: That's so important. I don't know if you know, but I was hit by a car, and one leg didn't work for a while, and I remember going to therapy and just crying like crying. No one understands. If there had been someone who could have even been an example to me to say, 'I've been through this. I know how you feel.” I mean, do those kinds of conversations happen?
GM: Yes, definitely. First, they would inquire about me, or I would just organically share my story with them. And then I would get a reaction like, “Oh my gosh”, and it helps to inspire others. It helps to relate to others at a different level than seeing a therapist or doctor, because having been through that firsthand, it's easier to relate and help.
WSHU: Right. What helped you the most in terms of people's attitude towards you? We were talking about helping before, and, you know, getting the headphones on isn't easy. And instead of going, “let me help you,” like rushing in like a savior, which I'm not, you know, I just asked you if you needed help, and you didn't. What would you like people to know if they're trying to be most supportive of someone who's had a stroke?
GM: A stroke, even the injury in general, obviously, offers support, as you did. You offered help, and I declined. People like to do things on their own and try to tackle different things as they come up. People just have to be respectful, like you were before, and just see that not everything needs to be jumped on, and let people figure out for themselves. Pretty much. People who have the injury themselves have to realize or try to understand that the advice or the help is not offered in a bad way to help make their life easier. And I've had to learn to accept that over the years, which I have.
WSHU: Who inspires you? Who helps you? Is there advice you've gotten, or a quote that you live by? What inspires you?
GM: No particular quote I live by, I do like a lot of cliche sayings, and they're cliche because they're true. I mean, as I always tell people. My parents have always told me, life is a marathon, not a sprint. And that has helped me, because at my age, 39 years old, I may not be where I want to be in life, but I actually realized that what happened now, I'm still making progress, and others need to understand that as well, that just because you feel a certain way, that you're still making progress. Things will happen.
WSHU: As you know, I have a child whose path was a little different because of a disability. And I often say, you know, life isn't often what you expect. It's all going to work. It just may not work out the way you planned it. Do you get a lot out of the work that you're doing now?
GM: I do. I do. I feel that the work is not just therapeutic for the patient, but also for me, to be able to share my experience and share some words of inspiration, or even for me to see patients who are more compromised, and I would think that I used to be that compromised myself, and to realize how far I've come. So that helps?
WSHU: Is there any way that others can support the kind of work that people are. Gaylord do?
GM: Just by having a good attitude, having to just give them any support they need, in terms of therapy, in terms of marketing for the hospital, just trying to keep their glorious reputation. It's a hospital, it's a business, and it also just keeps patients if they need rehab. I always tell patients that Gaylord Hospital is the best place to be. So just to keep the word of mouth of Gaylord and all the great things they offer.
WSHU: And they have a great rehab aid over there Ihere, his name's Garrett Mendez. Finally, my last question is, I always cry when people answer this, because the answers are so different. But why do you think we're here on Earth, Garrett?
GM: That is true. It's very subjective from person to person. Personally, I think we're just here to experience life with its ups and downs, to manage them as best we can, and to move forward with the people we love, creating great moments and memories to live by and remember.
RK: That's beautiful. Anything I haven't asked you that you want to say?
GM: No, I just I'm very happy about this new opening at Gaylord, knowing they have this great, excellent care in Fairfield County, and I wish that when I was a patient going through my outpatient rehab, that there was a facility like Gaylord that I could drive 10 minutes to, as opposed to 45 minutes where the main hospital is in Wallingford.
